Family Friday

Not much time to post today. I just rolled in from the Young Life golf tournament this morning, and am doing a teacher training thing at the church tonight, so I need to finish getting that together. By the way, our team is currently the leader in the clubhouse with a -11. I had a hard time carrying the other three guys on my back, but that's what servant-leadership is all about.

On Family Friday, I try to post some updates on my family, or tell those of you who read and don't know Kari and me a little more about us.

One of the things you ought to know about Kari and I is that we're completely, 100-percent incompatible. But we're also completely, 100-percent in love.

This is one of our favorite things to tell young engaged couples who think they've found the "perfect" person for them. There is no such thing as compatibility. There is such thing as humanity. And unfortunately, no matter how "alike" it seems like you are when you're dating, you're not compatible.

One of you will be a morning person (Kari) and one of you will be a not morning person (Chris). One of you will be cheap (Kari) and one of you will be generous (Chris). (Don't you love how I carefully chose the word describing me?!) One of you will like to splurge on food and skimp on clothes (Chris), and one of you will like to splurge on clothes and skimp on food (Kari). Maybe you won't be vastly different on all these things, but you'll be vastly different in some things, no matter who you are.

I didn't marry Kari because we're compatible... we're not. I married Kari because she was the person I wanted to commit the rest of my life to. Sometimes our incompatibilities serve as checks on each other or balance each other out; sometimes they just drive us nuts for no apparent reason. But we've learned (and are learning) how to embrace those differences and lean into each other despite our differences.

We're not compatible; at least not in everything. We're okay with not being compatible, because no matter what, we're completely committed.